Warning: this post starts out pretty emotional and depressing. Sorry. It's how I've felt for the past couple days, so I feel it needs to be included to get a rounded view to my stay here in the Netherlands.
Currently, I'm freaking out. The Dutch are a very exclusive society and it is currently very hard to feel part of the culture at all. I feel like a perpetual tourist anywhere I go, which, for now, is fine. On the other hand, I get the feeling that I will always get that from the locals or anywhere I go. Currently, I wish I had decided to study in New Zealand or Ireland or Australia, with a more accessible language gap and more familiar culture. It's going to snow here, be overcast for months, rain almost every day, be cold, and currently I can't see myself being happy for an extended period of time. I've almost never felt homesick in my life (you can ask anyone, really), but right now, at the conclusion of my first week, it's hitting me really, really hard. I was so stupid with my housing this year that my parents are spending hundreds more euros than they needed for me to be able to have a place to live, and I don't even have housing for an entire six weeks at the start of the semester. Looking for apartments here is hell reincarnate, and I'm happy/ lucky that Short Stay Solutions had what they had. The location is ideal, but I feel like an incredibly stupid and incompetent burden on my parents. I haven't been able to sleep well lately, if at all. One thing that keeps me wanting to stay here for a year is a girl I've met who will be doing the same. We'll see if she's worth it, but she's amazing.
But in other news, it's been a while since I've updated this blog. And that was probably the worst introduction one can make. The Dutch Culture and Language program is amazing here, and very intensive. Most of our days go from 9 in the morning to 6 or 8 at night, so throwing in partying or travel research or, in my case, looking for housing, is quite the load. We learn about the history of the country and the current issues that the Netherlands faces. Geert Wilders (pronounced "*phlegm*airt Vill-ders"), for instance, is running on a campaign of anti-Islam antisemitism, and may in fact become the country's next prime minister in the next election. Some of the things he says reminds me of some guy who persecuted Jews during the second world war.
The language has been described to me as "speaking with a perpetual flu". All of their "G"s are pronounced as if you are preparing to spit on someone, but somehow it fits in a word. They roll their "R"s, all their "W"s are pronounced like "V"s, and their "V"s are like "F"s. It's very similar to German, so I keep throwing in German words in language class. Unfortunately, the Dutch aren't fond of Germans per se, so that ship kinda sails in the wrong direction.
Last Tuesday was a great first night on the town with a small group of people. We took the bus downtown (with some of the girls looking like some very american students in another country, but oh well, yolo) and bar hopped a little. Found the Belgian bar again, great place. Long story short, a beer was intentionally poured on a girl making out with a Dutch guy, who then throws two beers at that person, along with a mouthful of water. Oh yeah, and *someone* ended up crawling on the roof of Cambridgelaan for a bit.
Last Thursday was a great night on the town, pregaming with all the UC kids here in Cambridgelaan, and heading downtown on the bikes (most of the bikes have platforms on the back for groceries, but commonly used for passengers). Ended up at the Belgian bar for a bit, and headed over to Tivoli, the largest club in Utrecht. Students go in for free on Thursdays. They dance funny. No one really dances with anyone, and the music ranged from Blitzkrieg Bop to 90s pop to euro techno. Lazer lights were everywhere.
Saturday we went to den Haag (the Hague), the location of all the parliamentary buildings and such (I will make another post about this trip later), and then went out again that night. Got to sleep at 5am. This whole sleep schedule thing is a little messed up. Monday was another day of classes, and today was our tour of Amsterdam. It's always nice waking up to prostitutes in the windows at 9am. More on that probably with the Hague post later. Bought some Burger King with some guys to get the closest thing to a real burger around here, got home, and promptly slept from 8pm to 12am, which is why I'm currently writing this at 1:45am over here. I'll be asleep again (hopefully) by 2. Class at 9 tomorrow! ...and the final tests for the program on Thursday.
I have an itinerary for my England and Scotland trip, but I need to actually buy tickets and reservations. Like really really soon.
I apologize for the way this post started out, and it might even be unwise to post this, but it's how I've felt for the past few days, and should end up in the blog at least once. Hopefully this will be the only non-level-headed post, however we'll see what the future holds. I promise to put up the Hague and Amsterdam adventures tomorrow, but for now I'm off to bed again. I miss you guys.
WE LOVE YOU!!! go see the sights.
ReplyDeletethings are working out. Love mom & dad
Matt,
ReplyDeleteKeep the blog posts coming. It has been great to read about your adventure. Otherwise, here are some things I have learned over the years that might help you on your journey...
1." You can always make back the money, but you can never make back the time." -- Regarding your slacker planning for housing ... yep, you screwed up and your parents are footing the bill for that screw up. But now you have to get over it. The best way to do that is to keep track of how much your slacker planning is costing them, find a job when you get home next summer and then bust your butt to pay them back. In the meantime, don't let it weigh you down. The last thing I reckon your parents want to do is pay all that extra money and hear about how the weight of that bill is preventing you from having fun and making the most of your time overseas.
This also applies to weekend trips or any other misadventures you might be considering. If you want to go somewhere cool, but find yourself a few euros short, just go. You never know if you will ever get the chance to go to that place again, but you do know you can always find a way to pay for it later.
Remember: Money can't buy happiness ... but it can buy a hell of a lot of great memories.
2. On making friends with the locals -- I am guessing you embarked on this trip thinking you would learn the language, assimilate into Dutch culture and make all kinds of Dutch friends you would keep in touch with forever. Guess what ... that probably isn't going to happen. The Dutch are great people, but they already have friends so they aren't always actively looking to make more. Even if you spoke fluent Dutch, why would Dutch locals go out of their way to invest their time in making friends with some foreign student who is only there for a short time?
When Kate and I moved to Barcelona, we spent a good bit of time trying to make friends with the locals. They were all very friendly and happy to share a pint with us, but few ever showed much desire to become true friends. But that was OK because we finally realized we actually had more in common with other ex-pats who were living in Barcelona -- not the locals. The same thing goes for you.
Most of the friendships you will make in your life will be born out of shared experiences. That's why you have the friends you have from scouts, high school and UCSB. All the young, intelligent people who are inclined to see the world and -- more importantly -- aren't afraid to set off by themselves to a strange land for a year to do it are the ones in your program. Those are the people with whom you are actually sharing your experience. They are the ones struggling with the language, the culture, the food, the homesickness, etc. Gravitate toward them whenever you can because you are all in it together and I suspect more than a few are the smart, reliable and worldly kind of people with whom you will remain friends for the rest of your life. Oh... and it doesn't hurt that many of them probably speak English!
(NOTE: You will still end up with friends in far-flung corners of the globe, but those corners might just be places like England, Canada, Australia and New Zealand, rather than Holland)
3. How to avoid sleep-deprivation (and still have fun/study) -- Once upon a time I traveled to places where there was simply too much fun to be had at night and culture to absorb by day. That is when I hit upon a sleep strategy I call "The 4 and 2". It goes like this... Have all the fun you want at night and do things like hang out atop the Cambridgelaan with your friends (In my day it was the Colosseum in Rome, the Eiffel Tower, etc), then get your butt home by 4 or 5 am to get some sleep. Wake up at 8 or 9, get to class/study and then build in a 2-hour nap in the afternoon or early evening. Add it all up and you are getting 6 hours of not-so-continuous sleep. That should be enough to power you through your studies and merry-making.